hot mess party of 2 ur bar is now available
Mattress luging...It's a long story.
Please tell me nicole sent the picture of the ejaculating penis to you too, otherwise I'll feel really awkward
I expect to be treated like a lady. Even If your sticking it in my ass.
I just don't understand how a line to ride a camel on a college campus could be too long for you to wait in.
I wish we couldve been like jesus and the desiples tongith
wine pong. its mother daughter day and i think she's mad. I smell like jager
I broke out the Krispy Kreme, and am possibly having random internet sex in less than an hour. I think I got this breakup under control.
I woke up with chocolate melted between my tits. I'd say that's a win for all parties involved.
Gays age differently than straights. 29 is like 45 in gay years. Next year I'll be in adult diapers and applying for medicaid.
The beer bottle was sticking out of your zipper and you shook it onto unsuspecting patrons
Someone is giving away free yogurt on craigslist. Can I get a ride?
That seems dangerous to buy acid from a stranger on craigslist
yeah, i'm probably gonna die. still gonna be totally worth it tho
I want you to know I am at work super hungover and I threw up in the mop sink. I feel like you will appreciate this
You're my fucking hero
Randomize
