I am not having having sex with guys at the moment.
I can pretend to be a girl if you want. I have a tongue.
After I talked about my ex for about twenty minutes, she just listened, sluts are so understanding
at least 'blackout me' had enough sense to take the puke covered duvet off the comforter.
whoever set the energy saving light timer in the lobby bathroom cleraly has no concept how long a work dump takes
My roomate asked me why she found condoms in the pringles container. I don't know what to tell her
Well I could just do a roadtrip and hit them all. Slut tour 2012.
If you don't let me come over I'm gonna call you on speaker and you have to listen to her scream and moan too
Considering that your "hello" was replaced with "Fuck yo couch," I'm not surprised that you have a black eye.
I walked home with him, but I had to pee...so I did...as we walked. He was so drunk he didn't even notice. Good thing I was in a dress.
So really what you're asking for is an allowance to not have sex on our futon.
We peed together in a dark alley while holding hands. That is a bond that can never be broken.
we got stoned then he started showing me how to make his penis look like a hamburger...if that's not true love idk what love is
I also fell asleep on the side of a tree so like I hit my lowest point there but it was a good time
Not as bad as when you were sitting in the pond getting fed water
Brother gave me a harry potter philosophy book for xmas we need to get stoned and talk about this.
He just kept going down on me. And he was all like, do you mind? No motha fucka, who would? All of his ex's, apparently. Whatever, he's a gem and I'm keeping him.
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