: south campus drug res life name erik. Love, tran
Will you take my knitting needle, stick it far up my nose, reach in my frontal lobe and give it a few swirls?
girl you didnt miss much. except me passing out for 3 hours AT JOBBIE NOONER on some random's boat. i was topless, then completely naked. heard girls were throwing ice cubes at me. i was useless. remember nothing.
Worst hangover of my career vs the return of the blue balls. Will keep updated
You broke a cabinet. You were climbing up it and it collapsed on you. Lines were crossed.
We would have taken you home with us, but you were outside the bar measuring a randoms stream of piss by walking along side it... you said you were only at 32 feet and it still had a couple of grooves to hit.
Because guys aren't supposed to cry. Especially when it's over a dude singing a Christmas carol.
I think you're too young for vagina rejuvenation but I guess you have never been one to listen. Sounds good! You bring the Percocet ill bring the vodka!
Note to self: don't try to shave your legs when sex-sore. You CANT reach, stop trying.
Woke up with champagne in my hair and honey mustard on my hands. Strangely, I'm okau with this
I mean I know I'll get over it by like tonight but ew ew eww. I cannot. Dude I don't even know his name also I threw up on his penis
Nothing says hey I wanna be your friend again like ambushing me with a dick pic
So I woke up this morning to find my laptop open, with a google search for "where to buy marble", and a hungover naked northern girl in my bed who told me that I claimed to be a sculptor last night and that I promised to sculpt a bust of her hands...
You're an adult now and it's your vagina. You should do what it or you wants.
When my card got declined you bought the vibrator without me even asking. This is what friendship is.
Randomize
