I hope you have a really shitty weekend. I love you.
people will do anything to get on MTV. like get pregnant.
I just walked by a homeless man reading the money section of USA Today...
Just learned the hard way that dicks can bruise the back of your throat to the extent that you cant eat. You're dead to me.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just so you know I would totally fuck you. Does that count as a feeling?
i woke up in the fire place with a lighter in my hand. if i would have died the night would have made up for it.
I recommend just blowing him. It's always the way to go.
I have no idea. I think this is what happens when people take drugs in the middle of the day
We would be rich. And the whole world would be stoned.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He is stood at the top of the stairs nursing the stolen cat
Apparently I was proudly showing him the cup I barfed pizza rolls into
Who doesnt want to be Yoda? I mean seriously, how sweet would that be? Live to 400, not give a shit about love and all that, know fucking mind tricks and smoke awesome swamp weed. I'm down.
I thought accidentally shaving off my fingertip while trying to shave my butthole was going to be the most unexpected part of my day, but no
My manager caught me going taking a nap in an empty room. Apparently she sleeps there too.
His nipple licking is glorious
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