I'm scared
There's nothing to be scared of. My penis is average size.
That's what I'm afraid of
today was the first day of rush. talking to girls all day makes me sick of having a uterus.
I have been referring to it as "thanks for getting out of me day" all week. Do you think they will still take me to brunch tomorrow?
WE'RE FINALLY ADMITTING THAT WE DESPERATELY WANT TO SCREW EACH OTHER. THIS IS WHAT PROGRESS FEELS
The cab driver is now flexing at a red light...
Omg do you remember last night you kept pointing to your vag asking who wants to play this like a fiddle hahaha
Just picked up an ounce of keif and if it goes to waste before the world ends I'm gonna haunt the shit out of somebody when we all die.
I feel so much better about my break up knowing that he's having his 26th birthday at Rollar kingdom\n
Dude. Going to the Theme park the day after the 4th of July was the worst idea I've ever had.
I couldn't fall back asleep it was too bright so I just took my sports bra off and put it over my eyes
By god, his vagina is better looking than mine.
Tell him to put up or shut up. Can't be dangling dick in front of ho's without delivering.
It's just disrespectful
My throat is burning
Thats because you proceeded to drink the salsa because you thought it was alcohol...dumbass
As in, legitimately worried. You just sent me a 6 message long text that did not contain any complete words.
He took a shit in my shoe. A part of me is livid and a part of me is impressed because that’s some real evil genius.
Randomize
