I don't know what happened last night but I woke up this morning with "wolf pack" tattooed on my knuckles.
he called you a drunk bob the builder and you proceeded to explain how you were going to build ramps throughout the house
You got a blow job by a girl whose nickname is "the terrible tooth"?! You are a brave man.
diet's not working. come over. i need someone to fuck the hungry out of me.
Please warn me if you ever end up in porn, cause I don't want to stumble across that on accident, okay?
How the fuck am I supposed to enjoy a third ice day from school if I only bought enough alcohol for 2?
I don't know, maybe act like an adult who teaches children for a living
It's like we're not even friends
Lindsey Lohan and I have slept with the same amount of people. The only thing she's now beating me on is rehab trips and teen choice awards, so really I'm the winner.
I feel like we need to find him and explain that if the two of them would just fuck he'd understand.
Seriously, though. As long as it's attached to you and is not a vagina, I will not be disappointed.
Don't worry dude, I've created a sex logic bomb to stop that sort of thing.
Let's just say, I will never again lick an asshole.
Yes ma'am. I'm attracted to unconventional people, you know that.
True. I can't judge, half of my sexual partners I only know a false first name & a number. We all have our kinks.
i read his ps3 instant messaging thing... he's meeting a guy to have sex. i think your boyfriend's gay
well true... there's not a real discreet way to masturbate in public
At some point you said you just wanted to get laid, so we had a moment of silence for your dead sex life...
Randomize
