i was like the pretty and slutty 8th grade girl who goes to a party, gets wasted, and ends up having sex with a senoir
details?
alcohol + bed + penis = sex
She's like a coupon for free blow jobs. No purchase necessary.
You are like a prophet. It's amazing how many people you convince to be lesbians.
So you think it's my fault? I didn't give you the 10 shots you took nor make you eat the brownies we made... btw, i found your engagement ring, it was in the last brownie you wouldn't let me have while dragging me to my room.
Yehhhaaww I'm way ahead of you. I'm gunna get her a card that says " I'm sorry your now ex boyfriend decided to upgrade"
2012 needs to end already. I've exceeded my quota for People Who Have Accidentally Seen My Tits.
I love you too! Remember NO alcohol or weed at my residence because of legal ramifications.
I think I just legit sprained my wrist from holding myself up while giving a blow J. God dammit come already
I asked him to change the channel. There was no way I could do reverse cowgirl with golf on.
He said I could stop sending ass pics now and just say hello. I'm not sure if that means he's no longer interested, or that he's a gentleman??
Damn you are the highwater mark of the naked women in my life. Like idk what lined up but yeah.
I promise not to pretend to be Jesus and take the wheel. But to my credit you shouldn't be saying that while I'm that drunk and we are in a car.
after we got done having sex, you rolled over and ask what your yelp review was. So yea I'm kinda mad.
I think he fucked my hip out of place.
We had everything under control until this one jackass fucked up. Thanks, Peter.
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