I just had to explain to my father, how having two screens plugged into my computer doesn't use more internet.
you washed your face with toilet water last night.. i tried to stop you but you wouldn't have it.
i asked him how he could stand the smell of skunk. his answer was "it smells like good weed"...
he said he "kind of had sex before.. Barely" i think it was one of those situations where you slide into home and get tagged out.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
What do you mean when you say no pre-party sex?
If I die I have 2 requests one a viking funeral prye and 2 I want you to take over my facebook and haunt the fuck out of everyone
I just helped a group of highschool stoners find a safe place to smoke I feel like a responsible rolemodel
Just found a bottle of tequila in the washer.
He's currently surrounded by roughly 23 girls he fucked and never called. He may not make it out of here. Bar of doom? Or of redemption?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
This is literally engraved into my seat "Need crack?" And then there's a number. This isn't real.
I woke up and found a stick of butter in my pocket. There's no butter in the house so I don't know who's it is. Using it to make cookies.
Seriously bro? Indoor roman candle wars? I guess I'll never see that fucking security deposit again
just saw the most amazing side boob. i wanted to hold it.
Yea I went out in footie pajamas and still got laid. Good night for u?
Hey, what's the French word for when you meet your boyfriend's friend and you have that gut feeling that you smoked pot naked in a hot tub with him at a house party years ago?
Randomize