When health care reform is passed, I'm throwing a kegger
You are the reason we need health care reform
i jus dunped the rest of my drink down the sink and tool my bra off. pretty sure this is the best decision for everybody.
He just came in my nostril. Never look down when a guy is pulling out during missionary.
i chased bacardi with meat sauce last night
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
All I want to do is get high and needlepoint. Fuck your judgement
Somehow I got food poisoning AND alcohol poisoning in the same night. Its like everything I love is trying to kill me. I'm waiting for my tv to make its move.
The teenager outdrank all of us. All. Of. Us. I woke up and she was getting everyone water and fruit snacks. I give up.
Thursday is not a good day to become a felon... It's bingo night
I deleted all traces of him from my phone
even the dick picks he sent you?
no are you nuts? saved that shit to my camera roll
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
fuck school, let's just become the worst strippers ever
I'm laying in bed cuddling with my teddy bear and eating waffles. I need a fucking boyfriend
I just bumped into this random I hooked up with a few years ago at Steve's party. Talk about a fingerblast from the past!
I just sold Adderall to a priest, im not quite sure how I feel about this situation
It took him 15 minutes to put the condom on.
I'm eating Arby's in the bathtub because I'm an adult and I do what I want
Randomize