this girl is running around outside screaming, it's creaming on me! it's creaming on me. I totally have to find my video camera
I just want to hang out with her.
You're a liar. Why do I have to give you reasons you can't have sex with my mom? I hate you.
wasted. watching meteors, awesome idea i ever had, see 2 for every 1 with ma double vision
he got a charlie horse midthrust which triggered my orgasm we're still sorting this out.
Oh man. Realized I was high when I realized how long I'd been watching Roseanne
You ass. You're not the one who bought me flowers, so obviously you will not be the recipient of the blow job of gratitude.
NEW INFORMATION meech found me passed out on a bench outside.
Dude it's bad when your 10 year old son makes fun of your penis size.
If you can get her to make out with you without paying for it, I will personally make you president of the american lesbian league
I just dumped the bloody coke bill into the tip jar while getting my hangover coffee. I'm literally going to hell.
It's 1am and I'm on LSD and I have diarrhea in a Dunkin Donuts. Help me
just curious, were the inflatable penis' received? Amazon says they were delivered.
Might call you tomorrow on a drunken hate filled rant, or just a normal hate filled rant, either way be ready.
Oh you mean the girl that gave me a black eye when I told her I liked her fake eyelashes?
Just stalked the girl I hooked up with last night's boyfriend. He seems nice, I approve.
Randomize
