Awkward is getting caught beating off in the company bathroom...
i'm not sure what happened. i know i woke up on the floor of his bathroom, then had morning sex with him. dont remember getting to his apt. dont remember much.
morning sex?... maybe not a total mistake then? he seems like a normal person, so rare at BU
oh no, he's far from normal. i know his high school girlfriend. she's CRAZY. and he definitely deals prescription drugs. also. he had sex with me even though i slept on his bathroom floor.
I'm at the casino and some dude apparently has money in an entire row of slot machines. Its like watching a really intense adult version of wack a mole
her cat watched me eat her out... I would use the alternate term for both of those things but it's too weird.
I'm pregaming for my hair cut. Working two jobs definately taught me how to use my time wisely...
Well as our DD it was my responsibility to get us home safely. If that meant strapping you down to the backseat using all 3 seatbelts then so be it.
Yehhhaaww I'm way ahead of you. I'm gunna get her a card that says " I'm sorry your now ex boyfriend decided to upgrade"
Who is Katie and why do we have her birthday cake?
I really need to create fewer "the time I was on drugs" stories for my future memoir, "my first year in San Francisco".
good luck with that
On a scale of 1-10 how seriously are we considering being sugar babies?
I'm about a 7.95
I hate when you actually try to sing and people think you're joking so you just go with it, but on the inside you're crying.
It's funny that when I fall down as an adult I'm so much happier no one saw than that I'm not seriously hurt.
I'm tempted to randomly yell out 'SO HOW IS YOUR UNDERAGE GIRLFRIEND' but that would be callous
And he kept lifting up his shirt every few minutes to check if his nipples were still there
That portable toilet under the bed? Turns out it was a tuba. Explains alot.
Randomize
