what if every blade of grass was a penis?
I popped a zit on your vagina. Don't say I never loved you.
The last thing I remember is yelling "ill handle this" while wearing a lion suit and holding a jug of vodka when the RAs came
what kind of roommate is she really? she wouldn't even hold my hair back.
He passed out naked in my bathroom, then took a shower, then passed out again and then took another shower. Last time I let my brother visit.
But seriously he was like a god with his hands. My vagina feels annointed.
Made myself shower before I'd masturbate. I probably should have wined and dined myself too, but that's pushing it too far.
The last thing I remember was you puking all over the inside of my door and him yelling "PUKING RALLY!!!"
I told him if he cums in my mouth he has to buy me a cake that says "sorry I came in your mouth"
you just missed a great speech in which i almost coined the term "ass-ian" as in "my vaginal and ass-ian regions are no longer safe"
God please dont post that to facebook.
It's ok, it's locked within patented Sealrite technology. That puke is staying fresh
Acid king. Jackson puked a lot. Promoter booth. Angry security. No acid. Probably a good thing.
we played his NES Classic. Turns out there is a warp zone to my vagina.
You spilt a drink on my couch, then used my dog to mop it up... you called her a mop dog, repeatedly
Is it bad that I'm not at all bothered by the fact that to some people I'm simply known as the girl that takes her shirt off?
Randomize