I went from sexy to sloppy in a matter of minutes
so then they started chanting "LET'S GET A LITTLE BIT SCHWASTED. S-H-W-...WASTED!" theres nothing like partying with former high school cheerleaders
She asked the class if starwars was based on a true story...
On a positive note, new entry in my phone as 'HOT ASS, DOWN TO FUCK'. idk if its a boy or girl tho.
Update, its a couple
I just wanna not walk straight. Is that too much to ask for?
I drink way too much to have a type. Last weekend I picked up a guy who calls me "baby girl"
she did 8 shots of vodka. THROUGH A SIPPY STRAW
I have got to meet this girl.
We were dancing and she was clawing my stomach like a fat kid getting to a half broken pinata.
I'm in the middle no shirt white shorts humping the white dustbuster next to the guy shooting off the tazer infront of the two guys humping on the bicycle
Dude I am allergic to the candy dicks from that sex shop in Vegas. Come take me to hospital right now.
you just missed a great speech in which i almost coined the term "ass-ian" as in "my vaginal and ass-ian regions are no longer safe"
God please dont post that to facebook.
Of the past 48 hours, 46 of them have been spent naked. I'd say it's been a good two days.
The Australian strangers convinced me to leave him behind when they started chanting Aussie Aussie Aussie, Oy Oy Oy, and told me they had a bunch of beer at their place.
I sent him a topless photo and he complimented my eyes. I'm not sure if I'm offended or pleasantly surprised.
I'm not complaining, but why is it that every time I hang out with you I come home with random injuries and random girls?
Randomize
