is it considered a "problem" when you find a pickle slice in your bed in the morning or is it like a "super-awesome bonus"?
It's like I'm the Little Bo Peep of sheparding dicks.
Only someone with your twisted mind could come up with that simile. Do you sit around and read 'How to turn Beloved Childrens Stories into Sexual Analogies?' This is the 3rd time you've done this.
The problem with having your drunkeness documented at a wedding is not only does it show up all over facebook, but all over professional photography websites.
I just won 10 dollars from out chugging the bar tender and I found out that the baby aint mine in the last hour. I don't even care if l get laid tonight any more.
I really wanna punch him. Right in his cell-phone-sized penis
She even gives head with a lisp.
he ruins everything I try to do including his roommates
I mean its cheating, but i figure i've made out wiht married chicks before so its like a nicotine patch, quitting by doing less and less each day
I'm going to get pregnant and die... Mean Girls warned me about this but I didn't listen
Let me know when ur ready so I can throw up one last time then brush my teeth
I'm gonna get drunk in the shower and yell at my parents during dinner. Have fun in Texas.
Today I found out that my boss keeps a breathalyzer on his desk for just these sort of shenanigans
So I had sex in the woods today. Anything else that happened today? Irrelevant. It was a GOOD day.
You were in no condition to manage a 3-way.
Its not something you can force it it just has to happen like a rainbow or pooping
Randomize
