shhh. i hid the ranch dip behind the rooster. don't tell anyone that way you can find it in the morning and it won't be all eaten.
wrong number but thanks
I caught a rooster roaming Edison Park then released it in the bar. They made me try to catch it again and somebody played the chicken dance while I chased it
Just role played anchorman. And yes, I did take her to pleasure town.
I JUST WANT SOMEBODY TO EXPLAIN HOW FORESKIN WORKS AND DO NOT UNDERSTAND WHY THIS IS A PROBLEM.
Please tell me you are a size medium in men's clown onesies and that you forgot them here last night.....
Maid of honor is brides sister and single. Likes lemondrops. You're welcome.
whatever. i almost had sex in a car with someone passed out in the back seat. phone's not my biggest worry.
Do ex girlfriends even count for summer sexcapades. Seems like the damage had already been done
Victory lap
nothing says roomie bonding better than a sunday shroom trip.
You told the cop FUCK YOU AND YOUR TASER, i dont think he appricaited that
Told her my spirit animal was the spread eagle. Now that's my name in her phone.
I'm making myself the patron saint of bisexuality
Write this down so you can tell me in the morning. "That bartender needs to be in my mouth."
Disclaimer- Don’t worry about my wounded nip. I put a bandaid on it.
I have a whole new respect for her. She chugged half a bottle of jack daniels, and then peed all over his wall. Serves him right.
Randomize
