i just walked into a room at this party and someone yelled "dibs!"...
I'm ready for my liver to be the last casualty of 2009
i'm drinking with a bunch of phds, i feel very stupid but good about my drinking abilities
Exactly. wat kind of friend would i be if i even pretended to give a shit about ur problems
Kayla got stiches in her face. Rode in an ambulance shotgun. Tried to steal a baby, thought it was mine
Hurry up and get here I'm judging myself
Your cousin just asked the bartender to start a round of vagina shots. Not body shots. Vagina shots. We're taking her out more often.
We had 15 min before last call. Exact quote "let's see how drunk we can get."
I need to find parents that want to take care of a grown adult. I'm sure there's a website out there for that. Like a sugar daddy but sugar parents.
We have GOT to stop getting stoned and going out for expensive dinners.
If I stopped drinking I'd have to take up murdering.
Considering we almost incited a riot on behalf of LGBT rights I have to say that was the best time for our moral compass to turn south.
To be fair, this is a tequila-while-rewatching-Benedict-Cumberbatch-as-Van-Gogh idea, so I don't know if it will hold up tomorrow.
Any who, I expect to be showered with roses apon my arrival
How about beer and nachos?
A fine substitute!
I looked into her soul, didn't I?
You eye-fucked her soul.
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