If I was Danny Tanner and my wife died and left me with three kids I would hire a nanny rather than bringing in the sexually promiscuos uncle with a fetish for leather and rebellion and my obviously mentally ill (possibly gay) best friend Joey, who has never had a girlfriend and consistently talks in cartoon voices... a nanny is just a better choice
And people are going to start dressing like that in public, it's just ridiculous, the goths and now the GAGAs
Just walked by a yard full of girls wearing bikinis. I did my best to stare.
dont worry about it. i always have emergency bong water with me
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Mass Text: Free blowjob to first person to bring me a nacho cheese chalupa.
Does the whole "it was New Years" excuse apply this year?
We are smoking a hash blunt ... Bring your emergency inhaler
It was kinda hard to explain to his wife why there was chocolate syrup on the ceiling.
I've got a 90 day supply of amoxicillin in case of zombie or chlamydia outbreak
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Is it completely inappropriate to base my morning after pill purchase on if they sell coffee or not?
Nothing can teach you regret more efficiently than a wine hangover.
I don't want to be drunk any more. Can you hit the off switch?
these past three weeks have been a real "fuck you" to my liver
Drunk me just want to text sober me for saving that half rack of ribs I loves you
Wait... so you had sex and then your ear drum ruptured? I'm not sure if I want to ask if the two are related...
Randomize