he proceeded to punch 3 mailboxes in a row and when i asked him why, he said "because they were talking shit"... i need a new boyfriend. and a new life.
I just punched cris angel in the balls. I have photos.
and i think we compared dick sizes, then high fived...
found a pic of my little bro & his girl naked. he got the brains and the huge junk gene. I hate him
so high and i think i just ordered a magic bullet.
did you call within the first 18 minutes? can i have the free one?
i dodnt think we hooked up bcause he actually texted me the next day
You know why I moved here? No public intoxication law. A cop just helped me from my bent over vomit pose, asked if I was ok, and gave me a ride home.
If I don't have herpes this will be the single greatest day of my life
Fuck you. You would only tell me how to get to your house in Spanish.
Day #3 of being the only sober person at the bar. This is depression.
its amazing there are so many photos of me and him separately, since most of that party time was spent sneaking away to fuck upstairs...
I don't think I'm allowed to have Burger King. What if i just chew for taste and not actually consume. Like a wine connoisseur for fast food
Sometimes a girl needs 4 shots of whiskey in her diet coke at 5 in the afternoon and i feel no shame in admitting that girl is me
I don't know, I think having hemorrhoids shows character. You have to be trying pretty hard to get them.
I did cocaine off my boobs last night. Then I wrote two essays and went on a run. Go me
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