Is it weird for a girl to post pictures of her dildo no facebook?
My mother just asked me if i ever swallow the goods...should i be concerned?
i cant remember past the part when we filled his tub with skittles.
He introduced himself to me as "the gayest gay who ever gayed." I like him already.
I just had a 30 minute conversation about hummingbirds. That high.
I miss high conversations.
Swinging. Is. Amazing.
I am currently explaining what double penetration is to the bridesmaid I hooked up with at my cousin's wedding. This is my life.
she did 8 shots of vodka. THROUGH A SIPPY STRAW
I have got to meet this girl.
I've heard awesome things about their margaritas. I also may buy a mustache from party city. Would you do me with a mustache on??! Hahahaha. But, really.
She lost her glasses and we found them on the roof. Don't ask questions. Kings cup was intense last night.
Sometimes crazy just comes naturally. I don't need booze to say that on occasion I feel the need to rip off my asshole and throw it against the fridge to see if it sticks.
After we drank 3, we built a raft out of the empties and installed the fourth submerged In the water to keep it cool. Keg boats are now a thing
It's okay. I've dumbed down my notes over the semester because I knew I wouldn't be up to understanding things come finals.
I just sold my hat for three car bombs. I call that a win.
God this is like a meg Ryan movie without the restaurant orgasms
I think vodka/water/skittles totally beats your crystal light mimosas
Randomize
