sorry i'm running a bit late. had to shave my brittney...was looking more like rapunzel. clearly i've been having a drought.
She stuck a Big Gulp bend-y straw up his ass to see if he could handle anal.
Ew, and?!
Well he couldn't and the deal was he had to drink something using it afterwards.
I'm praying to Jesus, Allah, Buddah,and the whole gang tonight that I'm not pregnant
i think it was just a coincidence but she literally vomited the second she saw my penis.
i don't even remember going to get food. i think i got gas too.
NC is no longer selling 190 proof Everclear. We are officially no longer the greatest state.
She just did a bodyshot off herself. I don't care that it's only seven thirty, come pick her up.
I am VERY upset that you called my fiesta a waste of time.
My mom opened up my bank statement today....my first alcohol intervention class is at 7:30am tomorrow.
I'll have party bus drop you off in the morning.
I just don't remember. It's like I went to bed on July 3rd.. and woke up on the 5th. Nothing.
And it was in that moment when I realized that these high schoolers looked up to me and that I should set a good example. So I stole a casserole and left.
Our group of friends now have more broken bones than reasonable excuses for why they're broken.
Maybe she'll change her mind but the "go fuck yourself" doesn't seem promising
We played table tennis, but used tv remotes taped to our foreheads instead of paddles. Every time your opponent scored you took a shot. I'm the current champion as of last night.
Only thing I have going for me is jacking off, weed, and saturdays
Randomize
