she offered me iced tea and went to go change.then her dad came in the door.i thought i was on how to catch a predator.
At an apparent methhead hillbilly bar and was smiling for a pic when one toothless wonder screamed "look at all them teeth"!
No more parties with babies... I can't do that again.
your cum blends into my yellow sheets :/
If it wasn't obvious enough to the cops that she was drunk, she threw in, "I like the colors of the lights because it makes purple."
Im watching him eat cream cheese and hot dog buns.
They should really start adding the average cost of day drinking to our cost analysis sheets. Does FAFSA cover this? No. It doesn't.
$645 later, she's throwing up in my washroom and asking for a cab. Hooker are soooo much cheaper.
Woke up the day after the party with a bruise on my stomach. Pretty sure my liver was trying to escape for fear of it's life.
Can you get the drug form of snow for the blizzard this weekend?
I just got stoned alone and repierced my nose. don't ever tell me I'm unaccomplished
I just got stoned by myself and am eating cookies so I'm right there with you
With a stable of 7 fuck buddies, I literally use a random number generator to determine the order in which I will booty call them on my way home from work. I have not slept in my own bed in a month. I just keep half my clothes hanging in my car or in a suitcase.
Is it sad that I planned a a romantic trip to dunkin donuts for and with myself on Saturday, then added an equally romantic after midnight stroll through the half off candy sale? I find that worthy of adding a few cats to my collection agree?
Yesterday we were fuck buddies and today I'm meeting his mom. That escalated quickly.
you were shouting "me peeing on him is the closest he'll EVER get to my vagina!"
Randomize
