she has over 3,000 tagged photos on facebook. dont tell me she isnt annoying.
Just facebooked the guy whose name you're yelling in there. So you're aware, his interests include "swearing at babies" and "Ice luge"
You just kept saying "I want my babies to look like you."
I'm not sure what happened last night but I woke up next to him and I was wearing nothing but my grandpa's diabetic socks, so I'm letting that fill in the blanks.
We bought home drug tests to see which of us could make it look more like a kaleidoscope. What happened to the days of innocent fun trying to best everyone with a breathalyzer?
She had one unshaved part on her vagina that she called "the soul patch" I just didn't know what to think
We fucked in my trunk while on the clock....what did you do at work today?
Then you bent down and whispered, "excuse me mr. Stair, could you please stop moving?"
I'm so drunk. Remember me this way.
Great. I broke up with him before he could like my selfie, now I'm down a like.
I need water and some morals
Dude on a beach in sicily and a blonde jesus just smoked us out and then tried to makeout with me I am never leaving this place
Sorry you saw me having sex with your brother on the beach
YOU CANT JUST BLOW GUYS BC THEY’RE NICE TO YOU LEXI
I CAN IF I WANT TO
I'm in the upstairs bathroom. I went to the bathroom after class and realized this is not a shit I want to have publicly. I ran home. We can go to lunch, just give me a min
Randomize
