i'm watching degrassi (go figure) and the episode is about jimmy not being able to get a boner and now he's famous and rapping about popping pussies..i dont get it.
i told him to take shots to cure a hangover and he told me i was "walking the steppingstones to alcoholism"
Just spent a extra 20 minutes on the phone with the lady from unemployment talking about how to make the best brownies.
you shall refer to me as my indian name from now on...running with dumb cunts
By the way, I'm pretty sure your husband is publicly advocating more BJs for my husband, via Facebook.
You could become Eskimo brothers with my dad. How can you pass that up? You pussy.
I just dropped $300 on lingerie. He better rip this off with his teeth.
I am gifting my birthday sex to you, but its okay because I can always just have birthday vibrator.
You are the voice of reason. And I'm bringing wine. Like seriously this is his last chance. Don't touch me once, shame on you.. Don't touch me twice, shame on me
I mean I love some drunk compliments, but he just wasn't up to my low standards.
There's no way you didn't at least start out with a dick. I obviously know there isn't one now, but there is no way that you were born a girl
HOW DO YOU FORGET TO FINISH WINE
Looks like I'm not in the Ashly Madison files. But my wife is.
As you were leaving you yelled at the owners that the stairs weren't suitable for "intoxacapated" people and promptly fell down them.
So I WAS right.
Do you think if I explain to her I want to have loud, unprotected sex with her sister she'll understand?
Randomize
