the fair has chocolate covered bacon...impossible is nothing.
at least 'blackout me' had enough sense to take the puke covered duvet off the comforter.
You should ask if we are margaritasing tomorrow. and yes i did just turn that into a verb
I'm about to enter vancouver's biggest liquor store. I feel like I should sent you a "wish you were here" postcard.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just saw a homeless man taking a shower in someone's sprinkler system....
i also took my stockings off in the bathroom and blew my nose with them in the cab ride home. james was appalled
Like if a baby's bottom had nipples, that's how my boobs feel
I'm a male taking pregnancy tests with every girl at the party. i have no regrets
I'm at that point in my life where stripping isn't the worst thing I would do for money
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He doesn't like Sabbath and that alone is a GIANT red flag. Learn from my experiences and never, I mean NEVER associate with people that hate Black Sabbath and Motörhead.
I don't think Buddha would recommend a sexscpade across Mexico
Curing hangovers with more alcohol was a great idea for the first five days
my roommates are pretty pissed at me. they sent me out for ice and i came back with a kitten.
after we fucked i left the room and when i came back he was patting his dick whispering "prouda you lil guy...prouda you"
I don't know if I'm having early flu symptoms, a miscarriage, or am badly hungover. Web md agrees.
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