I apparently took a 45 minute shower, and became best friends with his mom.
i have to start hiding my credit card when i drink i woke up this morning with 4 emails from Farmville telling me i spent over $800 on coins last night
it will be a sad day when drinking racks of keystone isnt socially acceptable anymore
I don't think there's a better bc pill reminder then when teen mom comes on
That's the girl I met who was peeing on the driveway with me. We bonded
God I hope my hair dresser doesn't realize that all these hairspiration pictures are from gay porn blogs on tumblr.
He's only going to be gone for two weeks
That's two months in gay whore years.
I've had to much cheese to give a fuck about anything. im tired.
Sex-sore abs and my workout pants have gravel stains on the knees. It's like the workout of shame.
I just got back to our room ....neither of us spent the night there but both our beds are occupied. send help.
Being engaged is strange. I looked at my cock this morning and said, "we did alright these last 32 years, right?"
She just sent me a message. It's a poem, about eternal love, that she wrote, about us. Just because I took her home two nights - doesn't mean it's eternal love.
Stealing, and booze. If only you added meaningless sex with random people you would have wrapped all your life passions together
Do you think I can get away with quoting Work Bitch by Britney Spears in my speech?
He and his ex stood there talking about going to get Chinese food while I was half naked searching for my panties
Randomize
