I miss you. Just wanted to say that before the drugs kicked in so it's legit.
Singing into hair straightener during spice girls....sooo dangerous
She turned over and said "You smell like my dad, i just can't do this"
I just had to ask my dad for money to pay for my birth control. I've hit financial rock bottom.
I just watched nsync videos for the past half hour and you could totally tell lance bass was gay in all of them
i feel as uncomfortable as your camel toe looks.
And before you get all mad cause I said "nipples," I actually discarded "you are so wet right now" and "you have such a raging clit-on right now."
That's called being sensitive.
I'm just gonna plan on never getting a bf. everything I touch turns to gay
So I think my aunt and her one legged boyfriend are getting it on in the next room. Traumatized does not even begin to describe what I am right now
I said geronimo as I came I'm not sure if he appreciated the doctor who reference or was just confused
Everyone at work loved my story about sobering up in a river with no bra on.
I JUST WOKE UP WITH MY UBER DRIVER
He was cheering for me from the end of the bar as I sloppily ate a Ruben sandwich. It made me feel really special.
*jedi mind trick* you want to go down on me
Was last night real life? Like did you really light your hair on fire
Randomize
