margs and chips and queso make the world go round
well and inertia
He is like the real live version of the state fair..
just threw up in the bushes outside my lecture hall. sometimes i hate the freedom college gives you.
woke up at my desk with a paper in front of me that says "people stranded on islands love having wet dreams" what the fuck happened last night
we were fucking and all I could think about is how my silly bands were glowing in the dark.
My parents are takin me for chinese food for my 4/20 present.
I fucking hate you.
I have to remind myself to breathe. That hungover.
In my drunk state I was like I ONLY HAD SEX WITH SOMEONE ELSE BECAUSE HE WAS THE HOTTEST GUY IVE EVER EVEN SEEN
Getting free blow from a total stranger, who asked permission to stroke my eyebrows, was the highlight of my evening out. Also, I have a new cuddle dealer.
And the view of you in reverse cowgirl is arguably the most spectacular view ever... And I've seen the Eiffle tower, the colosseum, mountains of Hawaii, Michaelangelo's David, and the Mona Goddamn Lisa. Just saying.
So my POF profile is full of Archer references. Only guys who get them will be getting any response to their messages.
The angle I tried to shoot a load on her face was unfortunate. I accidentally came on the David Bowie tribute she had out. Oddly, that made it more erotic.
Ryan. I woke up. At the neighbors house. And by the neighbors. I mean the ones to the north. The ones that hate us. Please call me. I am so confused and you are gone
At the neighbors house?! Like in it or outside???
In it on the fucking couch. No idea how i got here.
We lost. I'mma go home and drink more and do a face mask and wonder why it is that god put me on this Earth to suffer
Not to be hella graphic on main but I just came so hard I think I saw a new color.
Randomize
