God is so good, I would give him a blow job right now.
I just found three unopened cans of PBR behind our futon that I think I was saving for winter.
Sorry I had passed out by this time I think, with the chicken fingers ON my face in my bed, with all the lights on, and ketchup all over.
The dog threw up again, this time IN the toilet. I've taught him well.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I don't think I can handle being a slut. There is a lot more emotional stress that I never realized.
It was just like old times except for going to hangover throw up before waking my parents up to open presents. Merry Christmas!
Dude I walked in to my house just to be handed a bottle of vodka by my sister. She then said i had 15 minutes to finish it. Moving into my parents place is the best choice I have made this year.
The thumbs up barstamp on my hand is mocking my hangover with its positivity.
I had so much drainage I couldn't moan properly. Fuck allergy season
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
he may or may not have motorboated me on the steps of the library of congress
I just threw in a dip with a guy that superglued his fake tooth back in today. My life is complete.
he drank all my beer while i was at work and passed out on my couch, when i got home he was out cold and my room mates pig was licking him. they seemed peaceful, so i took 20 bucks from his wallet and left again.
My mom just found my nipple clamps...... oh God why....
I stepped in puke last night then washed it off my shoe with beer. Is there a grace period to respect before wearing them to class?
He chose me to be his birthday sex..theres a lot of pressure riding on this bang
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