i woke up with my moms heels on underneath your couch cushions
you want 1 or 2 eggos?
He told me he had never done that before...I responded with "clearly"
Saying she let herself go implies she was actually holding on
he just kept going up to random asian girls and yelling at them for breaking up the beatles
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My number went up to seventeen today. I forgot to add my random hookup on a sailboat.
He woke up, mumbled "silverware", and went back to sleep
How is it possible that i have sex with a guy and he makes YOU breakfast
It looks like sephora exploded on his dick, so i assumed I was the second girl that gave him head that night.
I haven't seen him since I gave him a hand job in the hospital. I like to think I contributed to his speedy recovery.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I have to bobbypin his pubes for us to have sex. The other day he wanted me to braid them.
I'm proud of you for choosing to be an organ donor on your fake!!
At the end of the night i was really thirsty and tied to a bedpost
You can trust me. I'm unemployed and not wearing pants.
He is a beautiful butterfly covered in tattoos and naked.
There's wine in the fridge here. You could leave school and we could get day drunk.
That's my favorite drunk.
Randomize