Correction, I've been on a lot of dates and a lot of dicks
you kept calling numbers in ur phone book and saying, "I love your show, I'm a long time listener, first time caller."
He had to pee in the sink beside my head because the girl that I was taking care of was passed out on the toilet. To answer your question: yes i took a peek. Thats why we hooked up later.
Going to bed. I have to wake up early and teach small children. And then have affairs with their fathers. I'm going to get deported.
i said she could sleep in my bed and she goes "iiiiiiii warned you. iiiiim a cuddlerrrrrr!" slightly regretting this..
searching my car for your cum before I have to give my grandma a ride to the airport. Thanks for this
She kept saying the tortilla understood her. I honestly don't know where she found a tortilla at the pool.
At one point I went looking for you and found you handcuffed to a chair. I'm pretty sure you handcuffed yourself. I don't know how you got there.
Let's be honest, your relationships fail because the man you're looking for is the equivalent of an intellectual blow-up doll.
People were wondering why I started hanging out with him after high school, the simple answer is now that I don't see his dorky ness everyday I can just focus on his amazing penis.
After we finished, she peed a little on my chest and told me she was "marking her territory". I didn't know if I should have been scared or aroused.
It's Jesse McGoddamn Cartney, the whole world sings that shit
He said that he had extra crunchy taquitos and wanted to go down on me.. I mean how could I say no?
I think my moral compass just broke
i fucked his best friend. once right next door to him. i'm pretty sure that could be called sweet revenge.
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