So I'm stoned for 420, and have an eye doctor appointment in fifteen minutes
Are your eyes okay
I mean if I was Asian they would be
What are you doing tonight?
Watching dora the explorer and pining for a sex life.
would you kill someone to have someone deliver pancakes to you when you were high?
maybe i get so drunk and make stupid mistakes cuz Subconsiously im preparing for my real world debut
nothing can go wrong this weekend. $1500 to spend. i have options for hookups every night. my backup plans have backup plans
Just sold this kid "Magic Furry Apples". He is way to high to figure out they are just peaches.
At least he's a nutritious stoner...
A 300 lb dude in a sundress yelling bible verses while wearing a raggedy anne wig is just as funny as I thought it would be. Thank you san francisco.
Yeah, but there's no serving sizes for dick.
I just scrubbed chocolate off the bathtub... You better have had a damn good birthday
I don't think eating half of a pickle out of my mouth counts as getting to know me
I wish my brain had a "congrats you just defeated the munchies" notification!
Hahah what did you even say to him?!
That I was gonna inflate his vagina with a leaf blower?
Oh.
The exact people you expect to find at a bar at 2pm are here. Come visit. We'd really like the company.
I'm setting goals and achieving them. I'd say I'm quite mature for my age.
You're goal was to fuck him and you don't even remember it.
I have filthy fantasies involving his tongue. My vagina almost exploded while he was licking that ice cream cone.
Randomize
