He was doing push ups, crunches and jogging in place in front of the restaurant. I'm not too sure I want to eat there if it requires immediate exercise following the meal.
I may have a concussion but the symptoms are the same as a hangover so I can't tell. Best 21st ever.
she just gave her compliments to the chief, at dennys
I don't know if it's the amount i drank last night or the number of taylor swift statuses on facebook but i feel like puking everywhere
They turned the water off again. Brushed my teeth with whats left from those pitchers of mojitos. So hung over i dont even care.
He SHOWED UP to the party wearing one shoe and a dinosaur hat. He kept lifting up his shirt and asking people to bite his nipple.
When did I go from having sugar daddies to being one? And does it count as a tax write off?
SORRY BITCH CAN'T, TAKING SHOTS TO WHITNEY HOUSTON.
You know what id love more than anything right now? ..a back rub while eating biscuits and gravy
He came inside and met my grandmother after we had sex in the driveway. I love that he has a van.
Tight. Want to get up, make coffee, sit on separate couches and silently read our mobile devices together?
While he was at a job interview yesterday, I was dropping acid. So that's the aesthetic of our relationship rn.
Anyone who does not consider cereal and wine as a balanced breakfast needs to leave immediately.
I just ate broccoli before drinking. Does that make me a responsible adult?
...i have a beer in one hand, and a chicken wing in the same. typical tuesday, right?
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