It really wasent that hard. The male one had a M and the woman one had a W. I just couldent comprehend that at the time.
Remember when we were trying to guess how many people could fit in my shower? The answer is 7
I was arrested last night for attempting to flee and elude. I wasn't really trying to run from the police. I was drunk and lost in the woods. I thought it was pretty obvious when I was waving at them from my puddle of puke that I wasn't really hiding.
I just saw a sign that said "STRIPPERS!!! As seen on Jerry Springer!". As if Springer is the highest honor. I'm pretty sure we're in south Georgia.
I just used 'come play with my balls' as a legitimate booty call attempt. And it worked.
just to let you know its hard to talk to your father while being fingered up against a car..
My vday gift was a joint bouquet, Finding Nemo on bluray, and a good shower fuck.
Um, WHAT A FUCKING KEEPER!
I was really proud of me too last night! Found a discarded hamburger that I have no memory of at the foot of the bed. Instead of a Dude. I'm really growing as a person
I find him attractive in the absolute weirdest way. Like I need him to do my taxes, but I also feel like I should spill things on him to gain his attention and then lick it off to gain his affection.
Bro you were on fire last night...like a less Irish version of Liam Neeson
No joke. There's a picture of the priest I made out with on my parents' refrigerator.
My friends got engaged today and I learned the techniques of going upside down on a stripper pole. I'm not really sure who won...
I came so hard I literally levitated off the top of his dick. Gravity was no match for that orgasm!
I got pull-out-my-nuvaring-drunk last night.
I learned tonight while in another country that no matter the nationality, men are disappointing in bed
Randomize
