So she farted while we were having sex but I was afraid she would stop because she was emberessed so i just went ahead and took the blame and apologized
I'm gonna put my relationship status as "widowed" to see if it helps me get some poon.
So i just found out i replied to my room mates craigslist ad. Akward
I just wasted my iTunes Gift Card on a season pass for Hannah Montana. Bad decision?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I need Christmas break to be over. I'm tired of fucking my old High School girlfriends
Question: Would it be wrong to just fuck both of them and decide who to date one performance of their cocks?
she was passed out on the moving sidewalks in the airport, we NEED to travel more often
The cops walked in to class and arrested 2 guys for possession.
im drinking tequila tonight so will you babysit my bra?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I don't even see the point of going over to his place dressed anymore.
I hope you fall on your chin.
Jealousy makes you ugly.
I honestly think the worst part about the night is they just kicked us out of the park and we didn't even get to go into Disneyland Jail
On another note- any interest in going to a gay bar to hit on 19yr olds?
Are you the reason I woke up without pants?
Don't judge me like that. At least the house is getting cleaned. If I have to drink and listen to Disney music on repeat for that to happen, so be it.
Just had to read the instructions to my microwave. How am I so high?
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