no you cant smoke seaweed
So yes, he's hot, a scorpio, an artist and a perfect cock. I think my bi train just arrived in gay town.
Woke up with a full plate of KFC next to my face. I didn't really question it.
I WALKED myself out of breath. And I'm lost I'm a Tim Hortons parking lot. That's how hungover I am.
If it snows I'm just gonna sit at my house in my costume and drink beer by myself all night.
So I peed on what I thought was a wall while in nashville come to find out while running from the cop it was just a dark tinted window and the while bar witnessed me peeing
I shit you not ... they just advertised a recruiting service for strippers at this concert.
The amount of knuckle children I've had to the Farrah Abraham sex tape is disturbing and impressive
I have to estimate how long it takes them to get to the bedroom so that I can sneak out of my room and get snacks. If she's anything like me, they're in bed the second he gets here and I can get snacks now
I slept through 4/20 and my roommates bought an entire ham that's just sitting in the fridge...
Dude. I need you to practice dancing around in your banana hamock. Party boy style. I'll call later with details.
not sure if actually covered in glitter or just drunk
This is a weird combination of planning and sexting but whatever
It’s official. I’ve hooked up with all three brothers now
You should go after Dad now
I should! He’s definitely middle age fuckable
All I heard was "sit on my face" "okay" and muffled screaming. I'm still disappointed.
Randomize
