youre talking to a girl on facebook chat right now and im sitting behind her in class lol. creepy?
he likes ron paul.... that's all i'm going to say....
swears the blind dude on this train is faking. Every day he stumbles and falls into a different girl's lap and then has to grab her tits to steady himself.
Why's my alcoholism being used to prove a point?
this just proves how much faith i have in "us".. what should we be for halloween..?
i'm in that phase where i'll swallow anything except food
she looks like one of those semi-pretty girls that turns into a 9 while she's riding your cock like she's trying to catch a train on horseback.
Doing tequila shots with my ex to celebrate that we broke up... not awkward at all.
I remember saying your puke looked like a jellyfish and you got very offended.
Well it's like a wise man once told me: "If you're going to shave your balls, don't do it hungover."
DID YOU DO SOMETHING WITH THE DEAD ROACH IN THE KITCHEN? OR DID IT LAZARUS?
We're eating jello shots in the library. I love the day after Valentine's
Instead of texting me to come over, she just sends me a batman symbol.
I don't care if she's a booty call. Marry her.
Hey I just woke up in the back of a pickup truck parked at taco bell... Can u come get me?
I need to get laid. Right now that freshman frat pledge & my Econ professor are the leading candidates
That’s quite a spread
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