So how was awkward coffee with forgets-your-name?
She had a muffin-top while wearing a one piece bathing suit. Thats gotta break one of newton's laws or something
just saw an anti-abortion rally outside of the courthouse...so naturally i tossed them out a coat hanger i found in my car
just told my mom that i'm having a bad day and she responded with "maybe you should pour yourself a nice drink". good to know that my parents support my future of alcoholism
he doesnt exactly give off the "im mature enough to use my penis" vibe
Valium party in the driveway. Attendance: 1. Don't make me do this alone.
He found my weave.. Think he'll still fuck me Friday? And how do I ask for it back?
Yeah.. he went to Tebow in the middle of the crosswalk and got hit by a cab... The yellow ones really don't stop
Also I spent like 2 hours on the hubble/nasa website sunday night looking at pictures of outer space and cried my face off at how beautiful and complex it is. What's wrong with me?!
No. I think its because I really and truly know that he is a moron and his future prospects are zoo animals.
As if right now I am a humanitarian. Full story to come in the morning. It involves sex.
If we accept the love we think we deserve do we also accept the sex we think we deserve?
hitting rock bottom is getting taziki in your hair & simply putting it in a bun instead of actually dealing with it, just like your problems
Last night when we banged she had nothing else on but socks that said 'property of Jesus' on them.
A young (I'm going to guess late middle school age) kid shouted at me from the crosswalk GAS PUMP OF SHAME! I have peaked in life.
Randomize
