Did you go home with that guy without me?
Sorry boo - it's pouring and I found a boy with a car
Say my name once during sex just to fuck with her. Like when it gets rough.
Its about time the women of america have a president they can masturbate to again
Should I tell Kevin that my finger was in his sister's ass last night?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
if you do not get any action from him tonight, I am personally walking my drunk ass over there grabbing his tongue and sticking it in your mouth. this is getting ridiculous
ii just google-imaged 'sad turtle' and maggie gyllenhaal only came up once. what is the world coming to?
he said he "kind of had sex before.. Barely" i think it was one of those situations where you slide into home and get tagged out.
Tuesday night just isn't my ideal coke binge night.
You just met him on Thursday, and you've already nicknamed him Golden Penis?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
if i'm ever face-down on the ground puking again, promise me you won't try to braid my hair?
I think it may of been me pulling down my pants is why she walked away.
I drank butter last night, who am I to judge?
Emily saved me from being trapped on my roof and then I beat her in a race at 5am it was a low key night
It was ok until his mom walked in and asked if he turned on the crock-pot...
You've got the chocolate, drugs and my pants. You hold all the cards...
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