just did a line in a complete hula outfit off a chick in a devil costume. do you think hell will be this good?
we'll penetrate his innocence with our dicks
she took out her dip, threw up, and put it back in. it was like a scene from Nick and Nora's trip to the trailer park.
I'm too hungover to be in a fucking cow suit right now
her cat was choking so she kept trying to stick her finger in her cat's mouth while saying "it's okay kitty, just do what mommy does"
please stop yelling "ITS NARNIAAAAAAAAA" out of our window at the lone person walking home in the snow
Edward fifth and chaser hands
I was in the bathroom puking up mountains of tequila and when he came to help me, I held the door shut and kept yelling at him to let me be a lady.
You thought that you were playing full contact and started screaming "I will fucking end you! I will end you!" and tried tackling everyone in the room.
Saw the guy I once slept with, he was buying Beer and shit tone of diapers. Glad to see how 2016 will turn out.
its weird getting into a political debate with a pony dressed as an anime character online
I dont know if hes kidding... but hes drunk and said hes going to shave his balls. Alert your emt friends
I had a dream involving the worlds smallest pony, an asphalt volcano, and jimi hendrix. Never smoking 3 bowls before bed again
We all just got ice cream, condoms, and toilet paper now were gonna go home and watch movies as a family.
Condoms?
I hate when pretentious people talk bad ab corn dogs
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