Dude she looked like Jerry Garcia's knuckles
Omg. I just woke up in a room full of naked people
I saw a penis in my cereal this morning. do you think my cheerios are like professor trelawney's tea leaves?
one can only hope.
Pregnancy confirmed. Complete emotional instability achieved. I just cried through 95% of Avatar.
the more i look through evidence of last night, the less i seem to remember.
apparently my insurance doesn't cover road head. Bummer.
She scratched my sunburn during sex. I didn't know whether to cry or cum
some guy just burried his vomit in the sand.
Just so were clear I meant the head your face is on
Drunk at work, covered in Cheetos is no way to go through life.
I found Cheetos.
I'd cum for enchiladas.
Don't pretend you don't want to dance on the edge of overdose all three nights
When that bartender tried to tell us he sang like Sade, I knew it was time to go
In other news I think my vagina is sunburnt
Also not to brag but I got high last night and got us a host family in a chateau in the south of France
Randomize
