As long as they suck a good dick I don't care what fruit they have and where they have it
hes totally cute, too bad i slept with his father
The only thing the cop asked me is..... "how are you still alive"?
I am watching the CFL at a Hooters in Texarakana. I made a poor life choice at some point that led me here.
I literally had to tap out of the blow job. It was like a pornographic wrestling match
I've created a drink called, "watching the sound of music with grandma." its straight vodka
Tried to dry my shoes in the oven last night.
While we were making out, he kept yelling at me for not coming to his wedding last month.
my memory may be fuzzy, but the 20+ naked pictures I sent him were surprising clear
When the theology professor asked me what touched me most about this trip to Rome, I guess "the guy from last night" wasn't the proper response.
The man sent me a video of him doing the helicopter, the least I can do is go visit him in the hospital
Okay I'm officially a Texan now, I banged a dude with cowboy boots
We fucked. Had a political debate. I won. So I sat on his face.
Omg my brain. Most recent thought: I fucking prayed in the bathroom that the other girl would leave. Prayed to Jesus
Some bitch is passed out in a pool of vomit. Fucking lightweight, it's only 8.30.
Oh, wait.. That's you.
Randomize
