The bar is filled with bros right now. Sucks I had to pay $5 to find that out.
It's more exciting when they aren't single....and even better when you have to pretend that you just slept with their roommate while trying to do the walk a shame as their girlfriend comes marching into the apt.
Im not the least bit jealous of the life you lead.
I saw his package. It spoke to me.
i wish i could swallow nair and shit it out and it would get rid of all my ass hair.
Is it bad that I just used Smirnoff as mouthwash?
it's like russian roulette but with a penis
I mean we had sex in a crib. You tell me how my night was.
Every bar we ever go to has a woman there who hates him. Getting so much vagina has never seemed so not glorious
I really shouldn't be this use to hearing "YOURE THAT GIRL?!?!"
Seriously, I look like I crawled out of a bog. Succeeding at being as undateable as possible.
I don't understand why you aren't on this trip all I do is smoke weed drink beer and get fingered
There's a kid in the back of the class drinking out of a flask. Like what is going on?
NOW HE'S DRINKING OUT OF A HANDLE. WHO IS THIS KID?
learned the hard way that breakfast jack daniels is a lot stronger than lunch or dinner jack daniels.
...this is why fuck buddies should be only for grownups.
We're sort of like brothers. Except with more sexual tension. And we don't look alike. Or are related.
So we're not much like brothers really.
Randomize
