dude, osama threatened the US again
dude. i slept with your sister last night
what?
I saw that as an opertune moment to drop some big news
Both he AND his 17 year old son were hitting on me... I'm bridging generational gaps
I haven't been "cry when you eat ben and jerrys" high in a while.
We FINALLY fucked. I swear that's the longest I've ever held out for
Umm you met him three days ago....
I said what I said
there's a wings menu taped to my wall. don't tell me i don't have my priorities straight.
what kind of wine goes with anal sex and shame?
Make this decision based on your love for dick - NOT based on the fact that its probably one of the worst things you've ever thought of doing
You need to come back and help me drink our beer so the fridge has room for the other beers
When a bartender remarks "wow" on how quickly you've finished a drink... Is that good or bad?
On a scale of one to liver failure, how bad would it be if I played thunderstruck alone?
Figured out why that fly won't leave. It keeps buzzing through my weed smoke
Fly high, Fly.
We have a little not a lot. We already rolled a blunt and named him Ron.
I had to get my boss birth control a work today. I knew going to ASU would come in handy in my career someday.
Update: day 5 and Scott has not left the apartment. Still smoking. Pizza roll supply dwindling.
Our sex sesh was interrupted by a bunch of hobos fighting outside his apartment.
Randomize
