I don't llike drinking between sober and blackout. Its boring.
is she serious with that outfit? Why doesnt she just paste a for sale sign on her boobs?
I'm never telling my kids not to take ecstasy, never. Idk what my mom was thinking.
you called her butter tits and then threw up in your cup. i dont know if theres any way to come back from that
he tried to breastfeed my turtle
come help me. im curled up in the fetal position on the upper floor of the lib. please bring more caffeine or alcohol
its ok. its hell week the lib is a no judgment zone right now
You insisted on going outside so you could "breathe real air".
I'm confused as to why I have a picture of your boobs in response to a photo of my father
Apparently I was proudly showing him the cup I barfed pizza rolls into
if i dont text back till morning its cause i turned my phone off and changed my password to something i wont remember to stop myself from drunk texting...RESPONSIBILITY
You know you have a good math teacher when we're talkIng about mixture problems and no one gets it until he explains it by talking about mixing alcohol
I choose my mates solely based on size and ability. No cuddles. No sleep overs. Definitely no repeats.
Why are you hurting?
Tried to drink all the beer in Nashville last night....failed.
You kept apologizing to your car for talking behind its back
I’m going to lick a fucking door knob when this shit is all over
Probably Waffle House
Randomize
