I hope i woe up in your car, or else i stole someone elses and slept in the back seat
i just made a girl do the walk of shame. as a bumblebee. i love halloween.
Was just shown the photos from a professional photoshoot my aunt had for their dog...not drunk enough for this...
We should never set our expectations higher than pizza bagels cause then our night is bound to get better
told weddin planner we wanted to work in ceremonial body shots before vows. she hasnt reponded yet...
I couldn't sleep so I drunk ellipticaled for an hour. Worst. Idea. Ever.
Do you think I can wear the dress I went to jail in with the shoes I went to prom in to the wedding tonight?
So I found the perfect "Yeah I gained weight since high school but it went to all the right places" outfit for the reunion this weekend.
My last google search of the night was "Things that cost $102.50"
Hungover and I may throw up in my therapist's office. Maybe he is right about my drinking
I feel like I'm going to get the reputation of being the girl who brings her dog with her to all her random hookups.
Thanks for putting up with my drunk friend last night. Its all fun and games till someone pukes macaroni under your fridge.
I would go a lot of places to get laid. But I would NOT go to Staten Island.
So I crawled off the trampoline to puke in the neighbors yard. Wonderful house guest right here
please don't forget about the bread in the toilet i am absolutely not dealing with that
Randomize
