ohhh my god. this party should be titled "my hookups of summers past" be expecting some good stories tomorrow
We just used hot candle wax from our joint lighting candle to make a bunch of new small ones how stoned are we
My roomate just said the he would "tap dat" to the 13 out of control girl on maury. Im finding a new place in the morning.
I've been drunk so often this summer being sober is exciting
I don't think he grasps the fact that I would much rather he finish inside me than on my $400 Anthropolgie bedspread
I'm at about main and main street
This is my first time seeing you since your lesbian experience. SO EXCITED!
they had to take the Corona's out of the fish tank because they wouldn't fit with the mini replica of the roman coliseum in there. so we drank the Corona's. does beer have an expiry date?
I am incapable of maintaining a guy's interest in me. It's like erectile dysfunction but with feelings
I need to pay that drinking in public ticket, but I also really want to get a spray tan next week... so priorities.
Look at all the pictures I have of us sucking on jello syringes.
its the first football sunday and my boyfriend isn't excited. this isn't gonna last unless he makes me snacks and brings me beer during the game.
I'm excited I love mornings when I'm not sober
Oh man I knew I took that Molly too soon, talkin to some Scottish people lol but don’t like rollin in pizza restaurants.
Reading becomes significantly more difficult when people are having crazy loud sex in an adjoining room
Randomize
