i got your date sluuuuuuut pick up my calls or else hes mine
Yeah, getting the HI-fiVe would really put a damper on my whoring around.
Yeah I'm pretty much like lane on gilmore girls except my mom doesn't look so mean all the time.
Sorry about teling your dad i'd have sex with him last night in front of your mom while i was drunk
dont worry, it'll just be a conversation starter like "why did you get that pierced?" or "wow, i got arrested there too"
I had to throw a towel over the bottles cuz it hurts to look at them
Do you recall us playing flip cup on your head?
I feel like his dick looks like a decorative autumn squash.
hey watch out, they threw flour on everyone who passed out at their party last year.
I thi k this dude I fcken showed up to the bar in a raisins shirts. I thought I was better than that. Fuckkkk.
I am not working on the very first day I can throw up alcohol that I legally bought and drank.
Apparently I missed the "You may have to jack off a horse" part of the application.
You thought that you were playing full contact and started screaming "I will fucking end you! I will end you!" and tried tackling everyone in the room.
So hypothetically speaking.. say someone dropped their birth control pill in a hot bowl of soup, and it possibly disintegrated.. would it be just as useful?
She had a toddler. It threw up and then some guy said party foul and put it on the porch. Going back next Friday.
Randomize
