Your tits are I can't wait for
Fun fact: he pulled out my nuva ring while he was fingering me.. he looked really confused at me and it a couple of times, so i just said "surprise! not only is it good for pleasure, it's also really handy for storing plastic toys." I'm thinking he's definately gonna call.
my grandma just informed me that patrick swayze used to babysit my dads cousins why wasn't i informed of this early...like when i was obsessed with dirty dancing!
I'm pissed I'm finding this out at 24 bc i could have used this material to make friends
I guess I just got drunk and ordered a mini fridge off the internet. At least now I know the 200$ that was missing from my checking account wasn't spent on lap dances only.
I have to overdose on valtrex I had a rough weekend.
I woke up in the closet and then I found my shirt in a bag of Doritos... how does that work out?
I have a completly random but serious question. Can I make a paper mache mold of you ass and turn it into a pinata filled with airplane bottles of liquor? Its for my art class
Like lay upon bear skin rugs, drink brandy and reminisce of the yesteryear's before a majestic fire place? Because those are my plans.
And our DD is passed out in the bathtub with the curtain closed. What happened tonight
Apparently while trying to get up from vomiting in the toilet I grabbed the seat cover for leverage and smashed my own head between it and the bowl. I don't remember this.
I can't imagine anything that has a removal ass flap as being sexy
I'm so lazy and tired i just want to cry and fall asleep in a bed of egg mcmuffins.
I mean, I'm not upset that HE's getting married, I'm upset his penis has to go through with it by default
when part of the plan includes getting high, i usually forget how the rest of the plan goes.
She yelled Carpe Diem when she orgasmed. Is it too early to marry her?
Randomize