Who do you think planted the wheat? Who do you think cleared the land and killed off the native inhabitants? Women?
I just had sex in a moon bounce. It is all down hill from here.
I love having hate sex.
The musician playing at the bar just puked inside his acoustic guitar, then sang an encore performance. I love Louisa!!!!
I won't be sarcastic... just naked
she's sitting alone using her breathalyzer as a kazoo. help.
You were demanding water from a bottle but I didn't have one..so I just took the water bottle from the hamster cage. You're welcome.
I need you to help me convince Steph that she will like Tequila if she would chase it with A-1
Oh btw I learned how to say "my penis is a flamethrower" in German. Tonights gonna be fun
Omg have I shown you my skeezy ex fiancée?
The other one.
How'd the date with the redheaded dentist go?
She didn't like my gingervitis joke
sidebar: i fucked your brother last night
My mom and sister were over. When my drunk roommate came home, he yelled "GOT BITCHES IN MY CONDO"
I've spent hours masturbating before. It's actually my favorite Sunday activity
Is kiddo a correct name to call someone who you stuck your dick in?
Randomize
