bad idea #53- masterbating while on period.
Doing "bucket stands" with buckets of margarita. Don't tell me it's not a good idea.
he thinks im joking when i say don't visit. i mean it's summer...he was the college fuck and now it's time for the summer fuck
I dont know if you relize this but ive been high ly medicated in my room for a whil now. GOing out into the real world would make me li ke tom ha nks. im not ready to be tom hanks..
at least you know where his tattoos end, so it wasn't a complete waste of time.
Remember that time I tried to pierce your nipples while high... it's like that, only with more blood... and less nipples
And the funny thing is when I went to the kitchen this morning, all 4 pizzas were still there in their boxes, untouched. My question to you is: what were we eating last night?
the gays at disneyland are vicious
See, the Lortab wasn't working enough, so I thought "hey, vodka can speed that up! That's how science works!" Which probably should've been my indication that the Lortab was in fact working
i just remember sliding through the snow and yelling i love america before puking on the oncoming cars
I have nothing to say for myself. When 2chainz comes on at the bar all bets are off.
i've created a new STD.
I just wish my penis was a person so I could give him a high five.
You are attracted to power and since you can't date the married old guy you have to go for the next best thing - his gay son
you don't need to worry about using proper grammar if you're asking for the size of his dick.
Randomize
