Do you think an esthetician would be willing to wax the Chanel Cs into my crotch? That way, whenever a guy gets ready to pound on it I can go "Careful, it's Chanel."
Yea went to the bars and he called me 2 hours later with random people saying he is at a place that i don't think exists
Ok see being that I'm not present or participating your vague texts "neeeeed that" and "vagina" leave a lot to question.
he said i balance and complete him. i feel sick
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Time for jim to play the "dont seriously consider pooping in the trash" game
I literally told her "she's a sandwich I'd like to make" and that's all it took
we probably should not get naked in my neighbor's garage again. just sayin
Was my mother there when I broke the stipper pole?
I met my future husband in an elevator. Think Hispanic version of Dr. Bunsen Honeydew from the Muppets, but with eyes like Michael Fassbender.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
he had a Pillsbury dough boy tattoo to remind him of his drug dealing days
If a treadmill opens up I'll run next to him and then fall off so he has to give me mouth to mouth
At least I got steroids and a baguette out of the deal
Just don’t be like me and break up between Christmas and NYE and then get blackout on NYE and puke in your undies.
Ok here's the plan: birth control, KFC, handcuffs.
They left me at home... I'm a liability
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